I found a good picture of me (and Billy Mays) from Halloween!
One thing that's been weighing on my mind lately is my body image. I'm 5'3" (on a good day). My measurements are roughly 36-26-34; I wear somewhere between a 2 - 4. I have no idea how much I weigh. I refuse to get on a scale because I know it'll depress me.
Normally, I feel good about my size - I'm curvy but not pudgy. This is mainly based on the size of my clothes. But when I see a picture of myself, I feel like a whale. Like one of those sad girls that doesn't realize that's she not skinny anymore. Even in the picture above, all I can focus on is the way my stomach looks. To me, I look sloppy in the picture.
Me being the over-thinker that I am, try to rationalize and come up with the truth about how I look. I know that in pictures, I look like a whale, but based on things like my clothing size I'm petite. It bothers me. I know that I've gained weight since my divorce - but I don't know if its weight from being happy (stress makes me loose weight oddly enough) or if its weight from changing birth control or if its weight from a change in my life style. Or if its a combination of all three. I don't eat that much and I eat fairly well, so dieting isn't really gonna help. I know exercise would help, but I stay pretty busy, so working it into my schedule is huge challenge.
I know this is a problem that all of deal with - society puts a lot of pressure on women to look perfect. I obsess about parts of my body that I never would have thought of before (like my back and ankles). I guess what bothers me so much about this is that for the most part I am happy with my body - as long as I don't see any pictures of myself.
Maybe I just take bad photos . . .
November 2, 2009
Body Image
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5 Thoughts:
You're beautiful, silly.
You are gorgeous. You are a size smaller than me, you're not pudgy like me... love it.
Never thought to obsess about my ankles before. Hmmm...
I feel the same way! I'm only 4'11 and 120 lbs...size 4-6. I feel good about myself (knowing I could be less and have been less but struggle to get to that size 2 110 lbs) until I see pictures of myself. I hate pictures of myself and hate thinking I'm fat. I'm not, but I'm also not skinny. I think most women are like this because of society. We are always trying to lose weight and get skinny. That's not right though. It should be about getting fit and healthy. So as long as you are happy with where you are and feel healthy, then that is what matters.
You just need to quit looking at pictures, because you're gorgeous, and you're perception of yourself is OBVIOUSLY warped, Deery Lou.
I am 5'5 and normally a size 9. Since living in Huntsville and being depressed and home sick I have gone up to a size 14. So I understand how you feel. When I was a size 9 I felt so fat, but now that I'm heavier, I would give anything to be that size 9 again. You are definitely not fat though! I think the last time I was a size 2-4 was in 8th grade lol
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